Friday, May 9, 2014

Pomp and Circumstance (Almost)

Today at a certain school on top of a hill, the bells rang one last time, locker doors slammed shut a final time, and a school parking lot drained out all too quickly. The same sounds were made, the same laughs were heard, and the same names were called today as they were when we first walked into that same school on August 1st, 2010. Today was my last real day of high school.

It doesn't feel happy or excited or even sad. There is only one word to describe the feeling that every senior is inevitably feeling at the moment and that word is "weird". I don't know what to feel. I'm excited for the future but then again it's uncomfortable. It's like we're mourning the loss of all the friendships we've ever known, the ones we've shared since we started Kindergarten in 2001. But at the same exact time we're fantasizing over the new friendships we'll create. The only thing I can connect this feeling to is my experience when reading Harry Potter (I'm a nerd, I know). You read a chapter where so much action happened and some losses occurred and all the sudden you find yourself at the end of that chapter feeling more emotionally confused than ever. You are excited and eager to move on to the next chapter to find out what happens next and to become enveloped in that story line, but you still find yourself lingering, fully reflecting on what you're leaving behind. That's exactly how I am today.

I know the next page of life will be full of more words and relationships and happiness. I have known for a while that the page I just finished would be coming to an end soon. But I'm in that weird in-between stage, that awkward blank chunk of paper between the ending and starting chapters. So the question now is, what do I do with that white space?

I think, for the moment at least, I will choose to use the white space to reflect. I've been a cheerleader and president of clubs and in AP classes. I've learned what I do and I don't like. I found Christ and real friendships and some not so good ones too. I've had an absolute ball as well as the most frustrating time of my life. It IS weird, a weird I won't feel again, but it's a good weird.

Hats off to you, class of 2014. You've been great and I wouldn't have wanted to go through this journey with anyone else. But now it's time for someone else to take our place. We left our mark, we made waves in our little pool. Let's not let the ripples stop here. Love each and every one of you. Your future will be as bright as you choose to let it be. God bless you all.


      Freshman year                   Sophomore Year                                       Junior Year                              
SENIOR YEAR!!


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Sunday, May 4, 2014

There's a Time to Weep and a Time to Laugh...

Tonight I celebrate my graduation from my "baby christian" stage. Tonight was the graduation that my Sunday school class set up for the seniors. I can not begin to describe how incredibly blessed I have been through this group of people. I have truly witnessed the hand of God reach down to touch the kids in this group. I have seen almost every one of them break down in worship and weep because they couldn't possibly comprehend how great, how loving, how gracious our Jesus is. And through witnessing that, I have truly came to appreciate the beauty behind such actions. Being with this group of teens has blessed me in ways I will never again be blessed. Teenagers seem to more easily be able to swallow their pride and get on their knees (or sometimes even literally lay face-down to the ground) and cry out to God. They put hands on each other and they pray wholeheartedly. They put their hands out and they scream and sing  and cry because that is the kind of worship that our God deserves. They become Jesus and they rake yards and they make soup and they brush kids hair and they sweep floors and they carry tables and they do what needs to be done in the church and in the mission world. Adults have problems with these things. They don't want to go in front of a congregation and admit that they have flaws or that they haven't appreciated Jesus the way that he deserves. They pray in extravagant words because they think that's the way to go. They mumble worship music in hopes that no one will be able to hear the words that they sing because they are ashamed of their voice when they sing. They have work and a family and they cant go to Africa or the other side of the country or across the state or even up the road because that's somebody else's job and they have a life. It seems like the teen Jesus and the adult Jesus are 2 different people. However, I believe wholeheartedly that my group of teens, my sunday school class, my brothers and sisters will help to change this stereotype. I have watched them change lives and churches and communities. I have seen God use them. I can't wait to see how God will continue to guide them.

It has been my pleasure and privilege to be a member of such a wonderful group of people. It's a bittersweet moment, but I know that God will continue to bless the next phase of my life. It will be a different experience but a good one. This is a moment in time, however. Never again will I see such blessings as these. Praise the Good Lord. Follow on Bloglovin

For Better or For Worse

In the past 6 months, my world has been spun out of control. Almost everything that could go wrong has, whether it be with me or my family. It has been tough and there have been numerous times when that little booger called doubt started creeping up on me. Dealing with hard times and still praising God the whole way through is easily one of a human's biggest weaknesses. We believe in a loving God who only wants the best for us and is guiding our every footstep at all times. However, it is SO hard to keep on believing this when you are personally walking through a living hell. What if I told you that even in the worst of times, when we are in the middle of one of our biggest storms, he's still that same God that I described above.

Society sucks. Human nature sucks. This world SUCKS. I mean it really is baaaad. Our society tells us to do what makes us happy, while our human nature tells us that sin is what makes us happy, while this world (which is controlled by Satan; 2 corin 4:4) tries to throw everything it has at us to make sure that we do give into this temptation. You wanna be gay? Be gay. It's okay, it makes you happy, anyone who says its not okay is a bigot and not truly a Christian. You wanna get drunk? Do it. You're having a fun time and anyone who says its not okay is judgmental.  You wanna have pre-marital sex? It feels good, so do it. Anyone who says its not okay doesnt understand what forgiveness is. You dont want to believe in Jesus? Okay, that's fine. You're a good person so you'll go to heaven anyway. Anyone who says differently has the wrong idea of God. These are all things that our society, our nature, our world tell us and they're all WRONG. These are just a few examples of the lies Satan tells us and the sad part about it is these days most people take these as the truth and they falsely use bible verses to justify them. I included this little section to make a point. What our nature tells us is love and is good and is right usually is not anywhere near correct. Just because you're going through hard times doesnt mean that God isn't on your side anymore. Just because it's gotten rough doesnt mean you can abandon ship and turn to one of the lies mentioned above for an escape. That is NOT who God is. 

So who is God? Lamentations 3: 22-24 say this:
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,

    for his compassions never fail.
23 
They are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.
24 
I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;
    therefore I will wait for him.”


This verse tells us that God loves us SO much that we are given second chances over and over again, every single day. It tells us his love and his kindness NEVER fail, meaning that he is always good no matter what the circumstance is. It tells us that these kindnesses and this love is new every morning and he will always provide for us every day. It tells us he is faithful to do this, meaning he will never fail to treat us to these kindnesses and this love. And it gives us as example of how to act at all times, saying no matter what happens in life, God is more than enough for me and his timing is worth waiting on. 

So your family/friends die. You lose your job. You flunk out of school. You are terminally ill. You are homeless. You are addicted to drugs or sex or a sin. You are in jail. You are in thousands of dollars worth of debt. You life is seriously screwed up. 

What now? Are you going to give up on God? Are you going to believe the lies that Satan will try and is trying right at this very second to feed you? Are you going to turn to one of those sins mentioned above to try and escape or to rebel and accept this new false idea of the "hippie God", the God who is okay with whatever you want to do as long as it makes you happy? Or are you going to take God's word for what it is and start believe that all things work together for your good. Are you willing to stand up in the middle of the turmoil and the mess and worship the creator? Are you willing to dig deep into the word of God and seek what is truthful and develop a relationship with him and accept jesus christ as your lord and savior?
Or are you going to sit on your butt, cry, complain, and feel sorry for yourself? 

God is good all the time. All the time God is good. Even in death, he is good. Even in loss, he is there. Are you willing to find him? 
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