God is an Onion.

Every night I read a chapter in my bible and try to learn from it as much as possible. Tonight, in one of the most short and unlikely of passages, God taught me an important lesson that I think we as Christians kind of adopted without necessarily backing it up with scripture. Tucked away in a segment of Mark 8 God taught me that he's actually an onion. 

I know what you're thinking: what lesson have we as Christians adopted that teaches us God is an onion? Well I'll obviously explain, but first thumb through your bible to Mark 8:22 and read to verse 26 (You all can do this, it's 5 verses). Basically Jesus spits in a blind dude's eyeballs (ew, Jesus) and asks him to describe what he sees. The blind man tells Jesus that he thinks he sees people, except they kinda look like giant trees to him. Now obviously the goal of Jesus' whole little miracle he's working on here is to get the blind man to not be blind. So Jesus rubs his hands around on this guy's eyes some more and all of the sudden the man can see "distinctly", as my bible reads. 

The first thing that came to my mind when I got through this section was times of season. In my own life this looks like my first semester of college last year. In others lives this could look like a loss of a job or financial trouble or any of the other thousands of seasons we can walk through in this life. God starts us on a journey and we get to a point where we think He should be done working his magic in our lives so we open up our eyes to look around and everything around us is all wrong.  How many people have given up on faith and God all together because of this premature peek at life and a hurried evaluation of God himself. We need only to have the faith of the blind man. To close our eyes yet again and allow the hand of God to touch us in our most vulnerable of places so that when God is ready for us to open our eyes we can see distinctly. 

So God is an onion. He's a process. There is no one-step acne treatment in God's eyes. You start at "Go" and you peel back layer after layer until God is done with his handiwork, not when we decide that we're done. Let's pray for the strength to be vulnerable to God and the faith to keep closing our eyes. 

2016 (Realistic) Resolutions for Dummies

My tips, tricks, and rules of thumb that anyone can easily follow for a better 2016:

- Read the Word every. single. day. Preferably when you wake up or before you go to bed. Do this in a calm, quiet, undisturbed and undistracted environment. 

- Eat desserts. 

- Breathe. In yoga you learn to breathe during exercise to lengthen muscles. In life you breathe to lengthen patience. 

- Smile. Again, often in yoga you smile through difficult poses to remind yourself that what you're doing might be tough, but it's worth it. A simple smile can be what you need to get through the end of a pose (which also usually is the hardest point of the pose when we think "I can't do this anymore!!"). This is a valuable lesson we can carry into our own lives. 

- To follow the yoga trend, do it. Often. It keeps you fit, it increases your flexibility and even your brain power, and could be the perfect way to wind down or even to wind up. It also helps aline your spine/pelvic floor and could be the perfect exercise for those who may not be able to conventionally exercise.

- Break rules. Wear white after Labor Day and before Easter.

-  Stay humble. You may be a 10 during the work week, but never forget your Walmart sweat pants/mud face mask/ 3-day-not-washed-hair weekend days either. 

- Life is hard enough. Buy a planner and use it. 

- Be organized. The older I get the more and more I realize how useful this skill is. The more organized I am, the better I sleep. 

- Speaking of sleep, spend money on good sheets and wash them every 2 weeks at least. Stay clean, sleep better. 

- Read books of all kinds. (If 50 Shades of Grey is on your "recently read" list, you're not doing it right and you're missing out on actual pieces of literature). 

- Pray. Frequently. 

-Wear what makes you happy, not what is trending. If they happen to coincide, awesome. 

- Keep coconut oil on hand at all times. Heals sores, softens skin, strengthens hair, and is a great healthy substitute for butter. Coconut oil and duct tape are musts in life. 

- Don't be a snob. Shop at Goodwill. 

- Drink lots of water. The benefits of water are literally unlimited. 

- When the going gets tough, the tough really do get going. 

- Do hard things. Often these are the only ones worth doing. 

- Dont hide behind a social media handle. Who you are is not who you are on a screen. Be authentic. Put down your phone in the presence of others. 

- Don't sleep in makeup, no matter how tired you are. Its icky, it ages you, and no one likes second day mascara. 

- People make mistakes. Your goal is godliness. Extend the characteristics of God towards people to the best of your abilities by exercising forgiveness, grace, and mercy. 

- Don't forget where you come from. Who raised you, where you are from, and who was there when you were at rock bottom. 

- Just because someone's lifestyle doesn't line up with what we believe from the Bible doesn't mean we have a pass to keep our distance from them. Never once did Jesus do this. It is our duty to be Jesus to these people and that requires interaction and often times friendship. 

- Journal. 

- Keep a working budget and write down all of your expenditures. 

- Just because something says "organic" beside it doesn't necessarily make it healthy. Make good choices. Eat less processed food. Put some green on your plate. Be awesome. 

- If you own a black dress, you can own the world. 

Happy New Year! May 2016 be the year you actually keep your resolutions (I know, who am I kidding?)

I Believe.

These days it's common for elementary school kids to throw on some pjs, climb into a big yellow school bus, and head off to school for a day of cookies, hot chocolate, and one of the newest but most treasured Christmas movies, The Polar Express. Unfortunately for me, my grade was the last grade that didn't get to indulge in this magical day at school until my 5th grade Christmas party, however no pjs were worn that day so it seemed like every other year for me. On party day as I walked into the bus room and sat down in my class's line, I saw the grade below me all clad in their pjs and slippers and was filled with jealousy. From that moment on I decided I would hold my grudge against The Polar Express and not the people in charge at my school, naturally. It wasn't until the last few years that I decided to let bygones be bygones and allow myself to watch the movie. Needless to say, it's my favorite Christmas movie now and holds such a special place in my heart. 

If you've never watched that precious movie, you're truly missing out. It wasn't until I watched it this year that I had an "aha" moment and my eyes were opened to the vastly deep plot. These children are on the cusp of not believing in Santa anymore, get picked up by the most magical train since Hogwarts (but NEVER to surpass The Hogwarts Express), and are taken to the North Pole to meet Santa-with a lot of stuff in between. Once they've met Santa, the main character is gifted with a bell from Santa's sleigh. This is no ordinary bell, however. The bell can only be heard as long as you believe in Santa. The main character ends the movie by narrating as an adult with the quote:

"At one time most of my friends could hear the bell, but as years passed it fell silent for all of them. Even Sarah found one Christmas that she could no longer hear its sweet sound. Though I've grown old the bell still rings for me, as it does for all who truly believe."

I get chills every time I hear this quote and it's the subject of many future pinterest projects that I have pinned on my pinterest. However, last night I asked myself "does this movie possibly have an even deeper meaning?"

Just as many children stop believing in Santa at a certain age, unfortunately many people stop believing in God as well. I'm at a crucial part in life where a lot of people go to college and begin to have doubts. During this time of year especially, "the doubters", as the Polar Express would say, seem to come out of the wood works. A virgin birth, a northern star, and God made human all seem like fallacies in their minds. We see lawsuits to businesses for not being diverse enough. Christmas parties become holiday parties. Nativity scenes are labeled "offensive". Coming from a science major, yeah, it seems pretty out there to a human mind. In science you have to have facts, evidence, theories, and formulas before anything can be labeled as true. Jesus requires us to believe, trust, have faith in something that, in their minds, has little to no fact behind it. 

So what if we are the same as the kids in the Polar Express? What if we look at this Christmas as a journey? What is we allow ourselves to climb aboard the train of God and let it take us to the Father himself? 

There's one catch to this journey: we must be willing. The Polar Express doesn't force children to ride so that their eyes may be opened, they are asked if they want to ride. The main character at first says no, but when the train begins to leave he chases it down to eventually get on. I don't care how we arrive to this train, but we MUST get on. Unlike in The Polar Express, however, the train is always there for us. All we have to do is ask and Jesus says that if you ask you shall receive.

Asking God to open up our eyes to him doesn't just have to happen at Christmas, and it shouldn't just be for those who have their "yule tide doubts". We should all do this, and frequently at that. Every day we should wake up with one goal in mind: to grow closer to the Father's heart. That can come out in many ways and it looks different for everyone, but every day you should live to serve your God and come to know him more and more. 

Unfortunately, not all will believe. Just as in The Polar Express, some will not believe. Some, like Sarah, will allow events in their lives to shape how they see God or if they see him at all. But for those of us who ask God to take us on his own train ride, we will always believe no matter how old we grow or how seasoned our lives become. The bell will always ring for us. 

As the conductor of the magical Polar Express said "Seeing is believing, but sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see." 

As for me, I believe. 

Relationship Goals

I live in a generation where all romance is dead. There's no anticipation during a first date because you two have already texted each other your complete bios. Goodnight texts are considered the highest level of love one can achieve in their relationship. "Netflix and chill" is the idea of a perfect date. And there's also this really annoying thing called #RelationshipGoals where we hashtag this next to anything we deem relationship worthy. Surprise, we're not really good at relationships.

I did a quick hashtag search on twitter and heres what "relationship goals" look like for our generation:

1) "___ and ___ are seen out in public together. #relationshipgoals"

2)"I wanna watch Elf and drink hot chocolate right now. #relationshipgoals" (not sure what that has to do with a relationship but okay)

3) a comment on a staged picture of a 3 week old couple on instagram that says "relationship goals" for no apparent reason.

4) "When he sends me a long text message telling me how much he likes me #relationshipgoals"

5) Some nonsense about how Chuck and Blaire are relationship goals. (Did you guys even watch Gossip Girl? Because I'm getting the feeling that you didn't.)

I don't know about you but literally none of those sound like "relationship goals" to me.

Relationship goals are loving a person when it's toughest.

Relationship goals are doing someone else's dishes or folding their laundry just because.

They're answering a phone call at 3 in the morning because your significant other is throwing up and they just want to talk to you.

Relationship goals are when he's really hungry but lets you eat as much off of his plate as you want.

Relationship goals are praying together, studying the word together, loving Jesus together.

They're foot rubs and hair brushings and random roses.

They're a goodnight phone call and a good morning text every single day.

They're offering your only jacket because she might be cold.

They're telling someone that you love everything about them in person 20 times a day so they don't forget.

They're trips to the grocery store for groceries that aren't even yours just to be with them.

They're carrying carloads of bags and not complaining once even though she's high maintenance

They're calling someone just because you know that they'll listen.

They're the times when you're driving down the road and you catch them looking at you for no reason.

Relationship goals are being called honestly beautiful when your hair is wet and you have no makeup on and your pajamas are 3 times too big.

For me, relationship goals aren't going to the gym together or being rich or watching a movie. Relationship goals are about living a normal life with an extraordinary person and putting their needs above your own every step of the way. So next time you go to comment "relationship goals!" on some instagram post of a new couple with a fake photo, rethink what you're actually saying. And don't you settle until your relationship goals look like absolute love.

**P.s. shoutout to my best friend and boyfriend for being the model of all of my relationship goals. Not a single person on this Earth could treat me like you do and I am so incredibly thankful that you choose to lovingly put up with my crazy self every day**

11 Habits You Have by the End of the Semester

Everybody sing it with me: It's the most horrible time of the year! That's correct, it's nearing the end of the semester which would seem like a blessing to anyone not in college, but to us seasoned scholars we know that the only thing worse than the end of a semester is actual death (Okay, I'm a LITTLE dramatic). Right now, I see a lot of posts from Odyssey going around about this very subject and I thought that a perfect way to procrastinate and put off all of my responsibilities would be to write one myself, so without further ado:

11 Habits You Have by the End of the Semester:

1) Your procrastination is at an all time high.

Yeah, you should probably be using all of your free time to study for your last tests or the upcoming finals you have, but suddenly everything around you seems more interesting. The floor MUST be vacuumed before you can even think about cracking a book. You've spent 30 minutes writing that 10 page paper, I think it's time to reward yourself with 2 hours of Netflix before bed, right? (This reason is also why this post was even written...oops!)

2) Thinking about end-of-term grades actually causes physical pain.

What do you MEAN I only have one test to redeem myself from the mistakes I made at the beginning of the semester? Ever heard of forgive and forget?

3) You're POSITIVE your professors assigned due dates while they were at lunch...together.

You have 2 tests, a paper, a quiz, 3 homework assignments, and a group project all due on the same day. Where. is. the. coffee. 

4) You're having to learn a semester's worth of material all over again.

At some point in academics, professors decided that the multiple tests given throughout the semester just weren't enough and we need a master test that covers all material we "learned" in the class. This means late nights in the library trying to learn everything you dumped out of your brain somewhere back in September. 

5) Your family thinks you're ignoring them.

We don't remember the last time we bathed ourselves. Calling home right now is low on our list. That is, until we have one of our famous nervous breakdowns, because then mommy is getting a call. 

6) What is sleep?

8 hours of sleep? Are you joking? Not only do you not have time for sleep right now, but your nights are filled with math equations or thesis statements. You can't even escape from responsibilities in your dreams. 

7) But when morning comes...

It's 7'oclock already? But you were just getting your best sleep all night!

8) You start breaking beginning of semester pacts. 

You PROMISED yourself you would make an asserted effort to look decent every day. This is a pact you laugh at as you pull on the same sweat pants you've worn for 3 days now. 

9) You remind yourself why you're here. 

Every 20 minutes. 

10) The only thing getting you through finals week is the thoughts of home.

11) And when you get home...

You try to show off your newly acquired smarts to your family without revealing that you thought about dropping out at least 20 times in the past 15 weeks. 

Now that you've procrastinated by spending  5 minutes reading this post, I think you deserve some Netflix. Where are your sweat pants?

I Stand with Ahmed

I’m sure by now through your Facebook or twitter scrolling you have come across the hashtag #IStandWithAhmed. Even those of you who are not politically motivated in the least have probably stumbled across the story of the 14-year old boy who built a clock and was told to put it away because it could be perceived as a bomb. You have surely heard that the boy was then arrested later on that day because the sound of his success rung in class when the clock worked and the alarm went off. Though I would be missing a perfect opportunity for a political blog post, I will refrain because to me there is no argument. I attended a public high school, I endured bomb threats, this didn’t even begin to fit the criteria of one- this was an act of racism. However, as an engineering student who has been in love with the sciences all her life, there is a more outrageous crime at hand- the stifling of a child’s passion.

            Upon enrollment in my current engineering program, my instructors tried to prep me for the rigor that I was going to endure in the next four years of my life. Many would start the race but few would finish. I had a class my first semester of my freshmen year specifically meant to mentally and emotionally prep the engineer for what they were about to invest their time in, making sure that we knew exactly what we were getting into. Through this course I learned that, whether you know it or not, successful engineers are created at birth. Those annoying children who always are asking “why?” or “how does that work?” usually are also the ones to figure it out themselves. The kid that takes apart the VCR and puts it together again. The one that likes to play with legos, likes to stay outside, likes to observe the natural world around them- that is a kid that has the love of science and logic bred into them. That is the kid that will push our world forward with their use of innovative engineering.

            When I heard this story I was sad because Ahmed was obviously this kid.  In college, inventions such as his are common. I am friends with clock builders, program writers, the kinds of people who make their calculators say their names on a Saturday night instead of attending a frat party. Last year, when the #BeAnEngineer hashtag (A hashtag I proudly sport in my twitter bio) exploded, I was sure that all people would be more aware that there are people like Ahmed out there-that they have existed since birth. However, this story proved me wrong. While a police officer was arresting Ahmed (again, a 14 year old boy) he asked him “why would you build a clock?”. I’m sure Ahmed didn’t even have a response because he and I are the same. Because it’s fun, because he found it interesting, because it’s second nature to him. It’s like playing with legos, working on a car, going to the gym. He even mentioned that he has numerous other inventions of his lying around at home. Making things is his hobby, his passion. Why wouldn’t he make a clock? I have an uncle who does these things all the time and I don’t think anyone in my family has ever asked him why he does it. He enjoys it, its how his brain works, he just does it. While I’m not like Ahmed in that I’ve never built a clock, my brain works just like his. I like fixing stuff. Whenever something doesn’t seem to work as it should, I find it really fun to play with it until it does work correctly. See what makes it work, compare it to other things, understand all of its functions instead of just using it. I like cooking things, building things, creating things. Understanding all of these things in their completeness. There is a high we get from getting things. Getting why a math problem is done the way it is, not just knowing how to do it. Getting why roads and bridges and neighborhoods are laid out the way they are. I can completely identify with Ahmed. I know why he wanted to build a clock.

            However I think the saddest part of this story is on the teacher’s part. I became an engineer because a teacher in high school looked me in the eyes and told me that he believed in me. I could do this. It would be tough, but I would be one of the ones that finished the race. I can’t count the number of days that we didn’t have class, just talked about college. Those are the hours that built me. Two years later and I still reflect on those conversations as I study late at night instead of hanging out with friends. Here, however, we have an example of a teacher stifling Ahmed’s dreams. Instead of a “how cool!” he got a “put that away!”. I mean, isn’t anyone else amazed that a FOURTEEN year old made a clock? Doesn’t that just blow you away? Ahmed made something and found a teacher he thought he could identify with and that teacher proved him wrong that day. I can’t imagine what disappointment he felt. His creative mind was put second to racist paranoia and I truly feel for him from the bottom of my heart. Before I wanted to become an engineer, I was dead-set on becoming a teacher. To this day I plan on getting my masters in Engineering simply so I can teach if I ever decide that’s what I want to do. Next semester I will be teaching a Calculus class. Lighting the same fire in others that was lit in me is very high on my priority list and God gave me a teacher’s heart. I can’t imagine a student choosing me to share their accomplishments and passions with and me just completely shutting them down. No person who can look a boy in the eyes and tell them that their creation must be hidden should be a teacher. Period.

            Ahmed, if you for some reason ever stumble across this blog post one day, I hope you know I believe in you. I too am part of a minority in the engineering field and I too wake up every day having to prove myself to others who feel like they are more worthy of this education. I work in the office of the Dean of Electrical Engineering and just the other day he was expressing that he wants his students to tinker with things, go home and build things. He said that that is what makes a great engineer. You fit the bill. I hope you go to MIT, get a great education, and keep on pushing limits because that is how all great things have came to be. #BeAnEngineer.

Apartment Life is Sweet Life

In 2 days I begin my second year of college which means that I am back in my not so quiet little college town trying to enjoy my last 2 days of summer before the rush of school begins. Last year, my roomie and I were tossed back and forth between dorms and, though we had a relatively good year, we decided that dorm life was NOT for us. So after searching for apartments in-between classes last semester we finally found "the one". This summer between my summer classes and working my old high school part-time job I drove down here to move in boxes, painted furniture after a late shift, and searched in goodwill aisles for hidden treasures, and now here we are! So, without further ado, welcome to my apartment tour! (Keep in mind that some more wall art will be added, but it's mostly done)

Our door with the most adorable little wreath!

 The panorama view of our living room

The chair- a goodwill find of my roomies. They recovered it and I think it looks so cute. The tables were another project of hers and the lamps were found in my attic. 

Our couch and coffee table. The couch is from Ashley's Home Furniture Store and I'm so thankful to my grandparents for purchasing this for me. It will follow me through college and beyond. The pillows were more DIY projects from my roomie. The table is an old window from Aquinas College that my dad and I revamped into a table. This will definitely follow me beyond college and I think its ADORABLE. 

Some wall art that I made. The letters were Lilly Pulitzer inspired and I made them last year for our dorm but luckily they fit right in. 

Our key/mail holder 

The view from our couch

                                       
The panorama of my kitchen (I tried, panoramas aren't really my thing)

Our kitchen table and chairs- a $20 Craigslist find by my room mate. Still looking for some wall art above it. 

The little wall art that we DO have in the kitchen thus far.

 The overview of my stove because I think its pretty cute. My nana made the dishcloth hanging on the handle for my first home years ago and I kept it just for this.

My little coffee station. 

Our menu board and some canisters. 

The cutest little spice rack 

Look! We're adults with real groceries!

 Our little utility room. Thank you so much to my Papa for the washer which was free and also for the replacing the dryer with a brand new one. Definitely made my life a lot less stressful!

Our little patio which is definitely still a work in progress

Our guest bathroom/Roomie's morning bathroom for when we both need to get ready. It was a hard angle to take pictures!

Heading upstairs to our bedrooms

The overview of my bedroom which I LOVE

My desk which was my brothers in college. The pictures above are black and white pictures of my hometown.

My bed, which also was my brothers and almost every other member of my family's. The canvases and bedding are from my dorm last year. I just couldn't give them up, I loved them so much!

My nightstand which is made out of a table found in my attic. Notice the coasters that I made out of Lowes tiles and my old Lilly Pulitzer agenda. 

My adorable Goodwill dresser! Im IN LOVE with this. Could definitely make this into an entertainment center or buffet in the future. 

High lighting my Goodwill tray spread. Super cute. 

The entryway to my bathroom

The panorama of my bathroom which is one of my favorite rooms for sure. 

My tray spread that I also got from Goodwill. SO cute. 

Some bathroom canvases I painted. 

Just highlighting my extremely girly and frilly shower curtain matching with these towels. Again, I LOVE how this room turned out. 

So thats it! Again, it's a work in progress. Thank you to ALL my grandparents for their purchases in helping me furnish the place. Also very big thank you to my uncle for hauling all of the furniture down here and putting it in my apartment for me. And a thank you to my parents for their purchases and also for buying my start-up grocery items. I am very blessed!